Pointless post to you.

This post will be pointless to everyone except me. You have to step in my shoes for a day to understand what I mean.

Seriously, I don't know if what I'm doing is going to work out in the future or is it one of those 'come and go' kinda things. Honestly, I feel really vulnerable sometimes. I tend to do things that are out of my league and think, "Hmm..I'll get something in return." However, it never happens. O.o Why is that? I mean it's not like I'm asking too much am I? I can't satisfy everyone and yet people expect me to. Now everyone just expects me to do things without telling me to and if I don't do it, then I'm the bitch! It comes down to a point that it's hard to say no. I noticed, just because I spend half my day doing things that people want me to do, people won't even consider what I feel or think. I mean seriously, my life doesn't always have to revolve around you. I need time for myself too. I'm really not good at confronting face to face. If I had the nerves to, I would. I just don't want my words to become hurtful to you. If I said it online, I feel unsincere, but I'm able to put words together better. So I'd rather choose not to say it at all. Never in a million years would I think that you'd come across this post. And plus if you did, you're not going to realize that it's about you. I've done enough for you, I just want to sit back and see what you would do for me. I can tell that you think, the world revolves around you most of the time. You won't admit cuz you're not that big headed. You're selfish. By now, you should've realized it. I wouldn't be wasting my time trying to clear my mind if I didn't care about this whole crap. There's just times where I'd rather walk away, but I learned that walking away won't solve a single problem. I see hints you drop, but I ignore it cuz I really don't know how to do it. I know you're trying to tell me things. BUT when I drop hints, you walk by as if I never said anything. Cmon, can't you put at least one tiny bit of effort in what I have to say? It's not like I'm asking you to give me your life. -.- I just want to know if it even mattered to you at all of what I say. If I don't matter, why are you lingering around? Why are you here to watch me act like an idiot? People have been telling me things about the way things are right now. To think about it, I would love to tell you. I just can't though. I'm not someone who would go up to someone's face and be like "Hmm.. you're a selfish bitch and the world doesn't revolve around you. Stop being so high-maintenance." (Not like I would say that either way. It's too hurtful and a bit too straightforward.) So in the long run, this is all going to be pointless. Let's just hope I hadn't made any mistakes for the time being.